Contentment > Pants.

Caitlin is bored, blog time!

Welp, not much has been happening lately - hence my boredom - but despite the lack of anything particularly exciting, I'm feeling pretty damn good.

Reasons that I would normally not feel good that for some reason (not pointing any fingers =p ) are not affecting me:
- Maattthhs! It bores the crap out of me! And we have some tedious assignment about the stock exchange! BLUGH!
- Psychology is also boring the crap out of me and we have an assignment.
- School in general is sucky.
- I have to audition in drama because for once I want a good part instead of always being the boring unnoticed background role.
- I miss Maddie and don't see enough of anyone else who is still here apart from Skye, and even then, time spent with her is never enough =p
- I am sleeping awfully.

Respective reasons why these things in particular don't really matter:
- Even if it's boring, it's easy as all hell and thankfully, so long as I don't let it mount up, should be simple to do.
- Same here for psychology. Plus, the essay topic's not too bad and should be relatively easy for me.
- Meh. It's school. It's meant to be sucky.
- Psh, if you want something you have to work for it.
- I can talk to everyone on the phone and on MSN, even if I don't see them.
- For some bizarre reason I'm not really needing much sleep at the moment, and a lot of my particularly sleepless nights are sleepless because Andrew is with me - best possible reason not to sleep.

I've been on an almost constant stream of good-mood-ness since the beginning of January. I mean, there have been upsets, but they're the right kind of upsets - I get upset BRIEFLY and then get over it quickly. This is a vast improvement on the way I've been since about year eight - getting upset over nothing for long periods of time and working myself into depressions.
And, I don't know, there's just been meh-ness. Since about year eight, I don't think anything triggered then apart from teenageyness, I've been kind of lost and confused about everything. I've been completely up and down - and while the highs were rather exhilarating, they felt hollow because I know a low would be coming, and the lows were dreadful - I've been confused myself, not really knowing who I was or anything about myself.
You know, people ask you about yourself and I would always be like, "I dunno." and then list flaws. But I think that's always been something that would be temporary; that just needed something to trigger it to end. For me that something has been Andrew. In him I discover everything I had loved and let go of - music (playing it and listening to it), photography, general madness, confidence, drawing... and a whole lot of new things.
The way I am, if somebody is enthusiastic about something, I tend to catch that enthusiasm. Andrew has introduced me to enjoying cars - though not knowing anything about them, that would be too much effort =p - to new wonders of the internet =p, to the power of not really caring what strangers think of you, and to the joy of knowing someone who really, REALLY gets you.
So yeah, I've been reminded of everything I used to do that made me me. I've been reminded that I can create my own world, pull in all the things that are important to me and weave them into who I am. I've been playing guitar, actually learning, and playing more piano. I've been drawing again, though still not much as I have also been doing things that I should - like walking the dog, making dinner, keeping up with my schoolwork - that take time. I've rediscovered the delights of spare time, and also of just sometimes not having it.
It's like a huge rush, and this great feeling of, "Oh, right! THIS is me! I remember, now!"

Anyway, yeah. Been feeling good. Got myself a deviantART, if you feel like checking it out here
, put up some of my better oldish photos, plus one or two newish ones.
And yeah... don't gots too much to say but 'Mmm...'
Contentment is so highly underrated.
Even more underrated than pants are overrated.

Agh! Ninja Zombie Bug!

.oooO ...........
..(....).. Oooo...
...\..(......(....).
....\_)......)../..
............(_/..

Look, feet. They are cute :)


There's this freaking ninja zombie bug that won't die and it keeps sneaking around and then appearing right near my ear and buzzing REALLY loudly.
I swatted it with the relax segment of the Canberra Sunday Times, but about two minutes after it twitched and stopped moving it was up and going again.
I am armed with a rolled magazine.
Stay back!

Welp, I am too lazy to put up photos from Friday night so I'll just link to my bebo and everyone can look at them on there.
Bebo = Here (Click Now)

My neck is killing me.

I am avoiding like, six assignments by blobbing around online. I totally rearranged my bebo and followed links everywhere to all these random places and random people's bebos and probably crept them out majorly :P

Hum, what is there to say?
I have:
ToK Journal: Thursday
Drama minor prac. project: Friday
Drama essay: Friday
Psych. oral: Friday
English essay: Don't Know When
ToK oral: DKW
ToK essay: DKW

... seven.
D'=

And I like, haven't slept. In a bazillion years. (Minor exaggeration)

Hum-de-dum-de-dum.
Jess has promised me she will make me a blogskin. With swirly patterns like the one here. I am excited :)
I have html for various widgets that I want to have on my blog but don't want on the main page because they take too long to load if you're not interested in them. There are three or four of them.

Hrm...
I is silly. I is sitting and daydreaming about my boy. I loves him very much. He is sweet and kind and really lifts me up (both metaphorically and physically - evil boy keeps throwing me over his shoulder and making me giggle ^-^). He's always there when I need him, and he's funny and clever, and wonderful at music. And anyone who knows me knows that I adore musicians =p He puts up with my random episodes of anxiety or depression and doesn't complain, he just stays and helps me till I'm okay again, and I feel so much better so much more of the time now that I have him. We've been going out for three months and three days, and he is my world. I love him more than I've ever loved anyone or anything else, I trust him, I respect him, I appreciate him, and I always will. Hearts to my darling magician, Stuart. <3

Know who else is awesome?
Skye. :) Caitlin hearts her Skye-bunny <3
Skye is superful and the best friendy friend anyone could wish for *nod-nod* She sticks up for all her friends and - *random moment* I got the ninja zombie bug! I got it! WOOOOOO! - is absolutely hilarious. She has the most adorable laugh ever! Tee hee! It's like an evil leprechaun! It's cute, but scary :P Skye is superful, and will always be one of my bestest friends :)

Maddie-bear is also awesome :) She is totally my fiancée ;) and we are definitely going to get married one day :) She is my pen-pal during maths and the best story-writer ever (Spanish, albatross, milktruck!). Maddie is really fair and non-judgemental and she'll always look out for people she likes, and sometimes for those she doesn't. She's one of the kindest people I know, and will also always be one of my best friends :)

Jess-poo/Jess-pie! Whee! ACRONYM BUDDIES! JAIATBAMUATWTOMSN. WNROORTTMAF, AIANGOT"SDIWDYAIAT"O!
(Jess and I are the best at making up acronyms to waste time on MSN. We never run out of retarded things to make acronyms for, and I am never getting over that "Some Day I Will Do Your Aunt In A Truck" one!)
Jess is awesome and clever and funny and the bestest at making blogs ^-^ She has yet to come to any of our parties, though! We must simply kidnap her and drag her along to get trashed sometime :P Caiti-pie Hearts Jess-poo For Ever <3

More awesome people that I am too tired to write reasons-for-awesomeness for include:
Ryan
Mandy
Zoe
Tallulah
Freya and her friends
Becky
Izzy
Grace (underwear buddy!)
Kelly (best sister-of-boyfriend ever ^-^)
and probably a whole bunch of other people who have slipped my mind for now because my head is killing me and I'm sleep-deprived.

Caitlin loves you all, because you are all awesome :)

And now, I think it is time to crash.

Nighty nights :)

zzzz: Limited Edition, Extended Version. *Only Available Online!*

This may be a bit rambly and/or distracted.
Why?
Because I have slept six hours since Friday morning.
I am a wreck.
But a very happy one.

I spent forty hours straight with my boy over the weekend :)
Friday night had a party, and that was super. Apart from Kelly being sick and emo kid passing out multiple times, it was awesome. Everybody seems to have had a good time. I certainly enjoyed myself, which is rare for me at a party :P It was really awesome.

Who was there.... Hm...
Friday:
Me
Stuart
Hayley
Grace
Bailey
Kelly
Sarah
Kathryn
Skye-bunny
Maddie-bear
Tallulah
Ellie
Keith
Hobbit
Jared/however his name is spelt/Filby-guy.
Emo Kid/Brendan
Two emo looking people whose names I don't know.
Heff
Heff's housemate Jimmy
A lady whose name I don't know who seemed to be somewhat attached to Jimmy
John
Ash

Kind of in order of arrival, but more in order of who left last (and thus who I remember most).
Those who stayed for Saturday night:
Me
Stuart
Kelly
Grace
Hayley
Bailey
John
And then Ash came back later in the night, and so did Keith and Hobbit.

Hayley drank too much on Saturday, but at least she wasn't as bad as Kelly was on Friday night >.>

I have photos on my bebo, I'll get around to moving them into my photobucket and then either linking that or posting them on here some other time. I'm out of time now.
Course, if you have my bebo you can see them on there.

Nap time.
Dead Caitlin.

"I have something to tell you..."

Skye's party!
Woo!

I dunno, I needed to update with something and I figured Skye's party would be interesting enough.

Had an interesting time getting out there, to say the least. Stupid father and his refusal to listen to my directions. Got there eventually, mucked around dancing around in fairy wings, they had a really crappy piano that we were all playing, which was amusing. Mandy got super drunk super quickly, playing shot checkers against Luke. Maddie got super drunk but slower. Stuart came up to me at one point and said, very, very, seriously, "I have something to tell you...", and it made me worried. And then he said, "I'm wearing a scarf", and we both cracked up. It was a fun kind of party. I have photos. I'm sure the people in the photos don't want me sharing them, but I have photos. Tee hee hee.

I don't have time to upload them now, but I will do later.
Mwahah.

The reason why boys smell so funny.

Woo! Actual update!
I have not updated in ages, and happily, the reason for my not updating has changed from being sad and not wanting to talk to being happy but considerably busier. :)
So-so-so, this week/last weekend:
Last weekend was awesome, because it was a long weekend.
On Friday, Bailey-guy had a movie night, which was fun. I only went because Stuart invited me. I don't really know Bailey that well. But yeah, it was me and Stuart, and Mandy and Steven, and then there were Kim and Bailey sitting on the couch looking awkward (two couples and then two singles). And we watched team America and some Highlander type movies I wasn't paying attention to. Hehe...
Then on Saturday night I went out ice-skating with Stuart and Kelly and Kelly's friend, and that was fun-fun, even though I can't ice-skate for shit, and I only fell over a couple of times, and those were in the last few minutes.
And on Sunday night, Skye had a movie night that was also fun, and involved us eating a tub of ice cream (yay!) between the four of us (me, Skye, Terri, and Mandy) and watching random movies.
And then on Monday night I went and watched the fireworks at my neighbour's.
Tuesday was good.
Wednesday was also good. Wednesday was pretty gosh-darned good. I'm feeling very smug. :)
Thursday was good, and it was fun, and I brought Stuart and Amy back here, and we entertained each other (in an un-sexual manner, thank you very much, all you gutter-minded people - yes, I love you all anyway =p) and then entertained the children (my brother and cousin, nine and seven respectively), which was fun. Oh, that reminds me, it's little Hamish's birthday today, he is now eight.
Today was awesomeness. I did my minor assessment piece thing in drama and that went reasonably well. And then I wented to Civic with the awesome people of awesomeness - Amy, Skye, Ryan, plus Isaac and minus Stuart, so not quite the usual group of awesome people. But awesome nonetheless!

So yeah, Skye is eighteen soon! So, eighteenth birthday party for her :) She's looking for somewhere to have it besides her house, though, because her parents weere all, bla bla no more than five people bla. But one of Skye's presents will be shared, and that will be awesome. Hopefully. Provided it all works out.
I think the next eighteenth of anyone in my part of the group is Ryan's, and then I'm not sure whether there's anyone else's between his and Stuart's.
I'm not eighteen till the year after next :(

Mm... so, peoples, ten cents to anyone who can guess why I'm so happy now?
Go on. One word. Six letters. First is S, last is T. Mm? My magician, yes. I haves me a loverly loverly boyfriend, and that has made me very happy indeed. Because. Because he is good for my self-esteem =p because he is wonderful and kind and sweet to me. And he is cute, but refuses to accept that fact. Tee hee.

Mnyarp mnyarp, anyway. Tis sleepy-nap time for Caitlin.

Oh yes, the reason boys smell so funny. It's their deoderant. It's like manly air freshener. Even the thought of it is hilarious, so how could the smell not be funny?
Mwa, mwa. Love for all.

Look, crap.

Basics
name? Caitlin
birthday? 23rd January.
height? Dunno. Short =(
weight? Round about fifty-five, depending on whether I've pigged out recently or not.
eye color? No clue. Either green or blue, depending on who you ask.
hair color? Light brown.
hair length? Meh, pretty medium right now. It can get quite long quite quickly, but I'm thinking about getting it cut shorter.
religion? Nuh.
mental problems? Shut up. Out of my head, right now, no nosing around my mind.
medical problems? Not that I know of, apart from being semi-blind.

On to the currents...
current top? Blue strappy-sleeved one.
current bottom? My old jeans! I love them. I'm sorry new jeans, but I just can't let go of these old ones. They're comfier than trackies, for frying out loud.
current jewelry? Er... my watch, I guess. Earrings? But they're just sleepers, nothing special.
current nailpolish color? None.
current shoes? None =)
current book? Thump! - Terry Pratchett.
current song? Stoned - Dido.
current tv show? None.
currently talking to? Jonno, Anna, Rosalind, Graham. (Well, talking at that last one...)
currently thinking of? So much that I don't want to share, and so little that I do.

The lasts...
last person you hugged? Hm... Amy, I think, and Ryan before that and Skye before that. And Stuart before that and Skye again before that.
last person you thought of? Have a guess. Go on. It should be pretty easy if you know me. Actually, no. It's not the obvious answer...
last person you fought with? Heh. Depends how you define 'fought'. If you mean 'poke wars' or 'shoelace stealing', then Ryan. If you mean actually fought? I don't know. I don't really fight with people...
last person you talked to? I'm talking to people now. Apart from people I'm talking to now? Amy.
last person you had dinner with? My family?
last person you sent a message to? No phone :'(
last person you sent snail mail to? Probably my nana.
last person you cried over? Heh. Go for it, guess. This time it IS the obvious answer =(

Favorites...
color? green
food? Skittles, totally. Or pie.
fast food? Mm, I dunno. Pizza... good pizza.
restaurant? I dunno. I don't go to restaurants. Ooh, wait, I know! The one they had at school last term =P
desert? Desert? Um, I dunno. I'm not too into deserts, myself. Dessert, on the other hand? Mm... apple pie, with vanilla ice cream ^-^
ice cream? Anna's answer was "cookies & cream". My response is, "Ooh, SO yes! Cookies & Cream ftw XD"
candy bar? Mm... I dunno. I'm not hugely into candy bars. Usually I buy Skittles from the vending machine, but they're not candy bars. Just candy.
holiday? Summer holidays, they have Christmas and my birthday (I may do philosomaphy, but I'm all for the acquisition of material goods =P)
season? Mm... spring. Or summer. Or autumn, for the leaves. Eh, I don't know.
month? End of November/December. The feeling of relief at the end of the school year is indescribable.
number? Dunno.
band? No idea.
song? Run - Snow Patrol.
lyric? Dunno. I have so many ones I like. Probably 'Light up, light up, as if you have a choice', at the moment.
job? Favourite job? I wouldn't know.
candle scent? No clue.
soft drink? Lift or Fanta.
karaoke song? Karaoke: Just Say No.
bar/hang out? Hang out? Oh, SO the Bay ^_^
shoe type? Um... nice looking and comfy?
shoe brand? No idea.
actor? Meh.
movie? Monty Python and the Holy Grail!
actress? Meh.
salad dressing? Eww, salads? Healthy = no.
tv channel? Hehe, ABC ^-^
tv show? No idea. I don't watch a lot of TV.
old school tv show? Meh, don't know.
board game? No idea.
hard candy? That was a movie.
flowers? Lilies.
animal? Bonobos ;)
pet? I don't have a pet :'(
cartoon? No idea.
comic strip? WEBCOMIX ^_^ - Questionable Content =)
book? Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.
markers? Hm?
medication? Panadol is my friend.
shampoo? Huh? It's all the same.
fictional character? Faye, from QC :P
air freshener? Dunno.
health bar? Hehehehe- no.
mall food? Gelato! From Gelatini!
mall store? Ooh, so Socrates or Tree of Life. Or Angus & Robertson...

Firsts...
first kiss? Shhh ;)
first boyfriend? None of your business, mm.
first pet? Teh kitty.
first best friend? Leisha. Haha, yes, THAT Leisha! Anyone who went/goes to Deakin and/or Lyons will know the one :P
first cellphone? Haven't had one, haven't got one :'(
first crush? None of your business =p
first broken heart? None of your business, yet again. This time without the little happy tongue-pokey-out face.
first real relationship? I have yet to have a REAL relationship. Oh, I've been out, but a "real" relationship? Oh pfft.
first time? First time what? () =)

Make-up...
foundation? No. Eww, you know those people with the metric fucktonne of orange foundation? So, so gross.
eye shadow? Mm, occasionally.
mascara? Mm, usually.
eyeliner? Occasionally.
lip gloss? Occasionally. Usually just lip balm, rather than actual gloss-stuff.
lipstick? No.
nailpolish? Rarely.


Dream on....
dream husband? Heh, no clue.
dream career? No idea... I don't even know where I want to go after college.
dream name? No idea.
dream pets? Kitties. Lots of them.
dream home? Somewhere in northern NSW/southern QLD.
dream award? Oh, totally a participation certificate.

Friends...
craziest friend? Crazy-giggly-taker-over-er-of-the-world? Amy. Crazy-hilarious-mass-murderer-of-males? Skye. Music-crazy? Anna, if I could claim her as a friend =p Actual-crazy? I know exactly who I would list there, but it might be mean...
funniest friend? Gah, no idea >.< class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">sooo...
most spontaneous friend? Heh, Skye or Amy.
loudest friend? Hm... I dunno. I'm probably loudest in the group. Apart from me? Well, Maddie can get pretty loud. Brenda can, in that grating-on-your-mind kinda way.
friend you think would end up hiding a body? Heheh, predictable answer? Skye, she'll hide the bodies of all the men in the world that she kills. Except I don't think she'd hide them... Ryan probably wouldn't hide bodies, either, he'd like, prop them up on the sofa or put them in people's beds to scare the shit out of them... I think Amy would hide them.
would you help that friend hide a body? Hell yes =p
friend you can talk to for hours? Any of them =)
friend most like you? Various people in various ways. Skye in the randomness, Ryan in the craziness, Amy in the tendency to say things that majorly freak people out.
friend you would marry? Any of them! ^-^
hottest friend? Heheh. Unfortunately only the girls in my group are hot, and I can't pick one of them without upsetting anyone :P
most adorable friend? Oh, so Amy. Just because she's so tiny! And she bounces! Like a little pixie!
most obnoxious friend? I'm the most obnoxious in the group. But any of us could be obnoxious if we took any of our quirks too far.
most caring friend? Most... hm... Ryan or Skye. Ryan is an obvious and wonderfully helpful kind of caring. Skye is a subtle kind of caring who you don't realise is supporting you until you randomly start crying on her =p
friend you'd do anything for? Any of the ones I'm particularly close to. Skye, Ryan, Amy... Probably Maddie, Stuart, anyone else who I talk to, really.
friend with the most drama? Heheh. Skyyyyyeee :P Though Amy does undramatic things with drama.
friend you had benefits with? Oi, awful question =p
friend thats the biggest tease? Tease? Tease as in making fun of people jokingly tease, or tease as in...
are you friends mostly guys or girls? Guys, but the kind of guys who always end up in large groups of girls.
would you die for you friends? Oh yes.
where did you meet your best friend? Which one? Becky and Izzy have been out of state so long I've kind of lost that closeness, and I haven't been at college long enough to really have made best friends... all the people I would consider best friends have their own best friends already.
where did you meet your 2nd best friend? See above.

50 Decimal Places.

So... school. I'm V-grading ToK and English. Not going to enough classes. I told mother about it last night and survived. She coped remarkably well.
I'm going to have to talk to student services and see whether there is any way for me to save those subjects. ToK especially.

I dropped in an application for a job at the newsagency in Woden on Thursday, and got a call yesterday asking me to go in for an interview on Monday. Yay combination of excitement and nervousness. I might have a job! Shock! Money! Wow!

Jess' Fun Factory party was awesome ^-^
There were like, three pairs of fuzzy handcuffs and some kitten ears involved =P
Hehe, Iddle Jess-ums is only fifteen...

School yesterday was meh.
I went to maths like a good girl, which was a LOT of effort. Really. After not going to a lot of classes for a long time, forcing myself to go to maths was difficult, but I was one lesson away from V-grading, so... so I made myself go, and got lectured by the teacher almost to the point of tears. The maths that I missed out on by not going is (most horrible, fucked up coincidence of all possible coincidences) the year eleven version of the maths that I missed out on last year by not doing any work and not listening. So it's going to be damn near impossible for me to catch up, but hopefully I will be able to beg some help off someone.
Drama was pretty bland. We sat in a circle and watched people walk around, and then... shock, horror: took notes from the board! Apparently next double we go to Woden and stalk people. Sounds interesting...
I spent my line off sitting around with the other people who had line two off, and fighting for Ryan's shoelace, which Amy (awesome hippie girl from drama and ToK - have I mentioned her?) tried to help me steal, and which Lachlan came past and yoinked out of our hands, curse him.
Lunch was, uh, interesting. Discussions were had about kinkiness and killing - thank god, not in the same sentence - and general stuff that I can't remember was said. The usual stuff along the lines of "CRIPPLED FISH!" and "Awkward Silence Turtle! *mad leprechaun giggle*".
We played Sardines, which Jess does not know. Sardines is that game, right, where one person goes and hides, and then everyone goes to look for them. If you find the hide-er, you join them in their hiding space, and keep quiet. If you find the people who are hiding, you join them, until all but one person has found their way to the group of hide-ers. That last person to find them is the first person to hide in the next game. Our version was slightly different. It consisted of Ryan, Skye and me going and lying at the top of the stairs and calling randoms and hanging up. It wasn't as interesting as it sounds, but apparently seeing one head and several legs sticking up/out of the place we were lying in was amusing.
Psychology was another boring taking-notes lesson, but I think I'm almost V-grading psychology as well as maths, so I can't miss any more of them.

Bleurgh... I am thinking.
I am thinking about other people.
Other people and their lack of money, and how they can possibly be so stressed out about it, when they still have more money than my entire family put together.
And how maybe it's just a loss of freedom thing, to suddenly not have money to throw around. As Skye said when I was talking about jobs: jobs are money, and money is freedom.
I'm thinking about whether I understand or not. I want to understand, if I'm allowed to.
I'm thinking about why other people are thinking about certain things.
I'm wondering what other people are thinking about certain other things... namely, me.
I am thinking... in very general terms, so as not to let randoms know who of the people I know is thinking about what (people who know me well or know the people I'm talking about, may be able to guess. But not randoms, so all is good).
But basically, I am thinking.
I used to think all the time. Non-stop. And then I just, stopped thinking. And I hadn't thought, properly, about anything at all, since about halfway through year nine, maybe a little after. And I've been working to get myself thinking again, and suddenly here it all comes back, and I'm thinking all the time again. It is surprisingly good to feel my mind actually doing something with itself other than making origami snails and eating them (papier escargot!).
So, I am thinking.
Be proud of me.

3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510

TV is actually remarkably boring...

Don't kill me for that statement, but it's true.
So yeah, I'm not in the greatest of moods right now.
Um...
Yeah.
I really can't see a way of explaining it without making a couple of people out to be really bad people. Really they aren't. And also I told them I wasn't pissed at them. I'm not. It's just suddenly upset me in the past couple of hours.
So yeah.
Hopefully it will be sorted out tomorrow.
Sorry if I'm snapping at anyone tonight.

Edit: It is now tomorrow and I am in an even less pleasant mood. Hoo-rah! But see, now it's more of a tired, resigned and sad mood. Yay. Fun fun, and whatnot. So, where most people would say "Don't talk to me", I am instead asking that you all please talk to me so I can be distracted. Thank you =)

OMG Jess's Birthday!

Hehehe, I remembered! Happy Birthday Jess! Sweet... fifteen. Haha, not legal yet. Iddle Jessy-wums is still iddle and Jessy-wum-y! Hehehe... don't hurt me =P
Welp, I'm too lazy to say wonderful things about the wonderful Jess, but she's fifteen today so everybody wish her a happy birthday :P

zomg blog (Yay Lack of Capital Letters in My Title!)

If you don't like being confused, skip the first two paragraphs.

I have yummy orange cake and tea ^-^
Why do I have yummy orange cake and tea?
Because mother brought me yummy orange cake and tea from downstairs.
Why?
Why causal, why what? Why? Because she moved her arms and legs to carry the plate and cup and thus was propelled up the stairs.
But why-why. Why did she choose to bring me the tea and cake?
Because she wants me to eat, because she thinks I don't eat enough. Also because she wants to encourage me to do my theory of knowledge essay.
Why does she want me to do this essay?
Because she is a silly and wonderful mother who worries about me, and I should do this essay now.
First order desire is to write blogs, eat cake, and drink tea. Second order desire is to want to work. I want to want to work, but in reality I just want food and drink.

As you may be able to tell, doing theory of knowledge stuff messes with my head.
The questioning of the 'why's and 'because's is stuff about cause and effect and how it's approached from various angles. Biological view explains what muscles move to cause this or that to happen. Other views are along the lines of "because she wants to feed her daughter" and evolutionarily - "because she wants her children to survive and pass her genes on down" or, from a more nurturing perspective - "because she is a good mother".
It's all very silly.
That's why I like thinking...
The first/second order desire is free will stuff.
Free will is my current assignment's topic. I may post what I have so far underneath this blog, but after it. Usually the most recent post is at the top, so I'll have to post it afterwards but set the post time so that blogger thinks it was posted earlier, so that it appears underneath this post.
Anyway... the orange cake and tea are nice.

So the folk festival thing, yeah. I'm not sure what day I'm actually going now, because I have this assignment to do, and I'll either do the assignment today and early-ish tomorrow, and go on Monday, or do it today and Monday and go tomorrow. We decided (mother and I) against going today, because I want to go on the same day as Freya goes, and I can't go on more than one day (yay lack of money >.<), and Freya gets back from Queensland (along with Bridie, Connor and Dad) tonight, so. We can all go tomorrow, which should be fun. Or else on Monday. But y'know, they're always half-closed on the last day, which sucks. Anybody who's going, as I've said, poke me and say hi, it'd be cool to have someone else to talk to.

So yeah, I went for a walk with mum this morning (by morning I mean about one in the afternoon, but y'know, me and any-time-before-midday-on-a-non-school-day do not get along well). We wandered up round Oakey Hill... I don't know if I'm spelling that right... I've lived near-ish the base of that hill since I was two months old and I don't know how to spell it ^-^ Almost as bad as still not knowing my way around Woden. Pfft, I don't need to know my way around: I always go with people who know their way around, and I can just follow them. Anyway, went walking with mother this morning, and realised how much I missed exercise. I have, for the past couple of years, avoided exercise as much as at all possible. And, while I haven't got fat or anything, it really has made a difference to how I feel. Being lazy makes me feel lethargic, and it makes my mind sleepy. And then when I get up, I have too much energy and I get jittery and easily distracted. So a sleepy mind and short attention span are really not much fun. But after the DDR-ing yesterday and the walking today, I was reminded of how I used to feel after playing tennis or going running with Mum or Freya, or riding with Dad or the cousin-family. It's wonderful. It's better than caffeine. (Shock! I hear at least two people plotting my death for even suggesting that anything could be better than caffeine. One I know is likely to read this. Jess, don't kill me. (Pretty please)(... with a cherry on top)) It's the exact opposite of the feeling I get from being lazy - my body's tired but my mind's awake. Now, that makes it much, much easier to get work done, and much easier to get to sleep, and I generally feel better. So, I'm thinking maybe I could actually get outside and do some exercise these holidays, as opposed to lying in bed all day everyday, which is what I usually do in the holidays. Maybe go for a ride around the lake with Freya, or poke the family into heading over to the Yarralumla tennis courts. I dunno. I just need to get outside more often >.<

(Long blog! Oh, man, I haven't written a long blog in ages! Maybe it was the lack of exercise...)

My nana's staying with us for a while. I dunno how long. I don't even know how long she's in Canberra for, let alone how long she's actually spending with my family. She'll spend some time at Adair's, too (Adair is my mother's sister, in case I haven't mentioned that a bazillion times yet), so I dunno. Anyway, my nana is awesome. Have I already ranted about her in one of my long posts? I'm pretty sure I have. Click 'people' at the bottom of the post and see if anything about her comes up. Nana Ilma is great ^-^ I argue with her a lot, but I can also get on really, really well with her. What kind of person can you be mad at and adore at the same time? Well, she is very, very similar to me, but far more intelligent and wise, of course. And you know my obsession with grammar and spelling? Hers is worse. It's scary. We have too much in common to be able to get along all the time, but when we do, it's great.

Damnit, I've run out of tea.

Heh, it's funny, you know, other people's caffeine addictions. I don't drink coffee, and I don't even really drink coke anymore. I don't like coffee, and while I don't mind coke, I prefer lemonade or flavoured milk. And I refuse to drink something just for its caffeine content. Just like I refuse to drink alcohol purely to get drunk (So shush up, Misters Graham and Ryan). If it doesn't taste good, I'm not drinking it, damnit, and I don't like the tastes of most alcoholic drinks, so I don't drink them. I don't like the taste of coffee, so I don't drink it. Besides, can anyone imagine me full of caffeine? Does it seem like a bad idea? Yes, I thought so. Anybody who saw me on a milo-high last year will know. Bad, bad idea. Milo or pocky. Dangerous. Anyway, I was just reminded of caffeine by my tea. Tea has caffeine in it. I only drink it because it tastes good to me. And tea is the most caffeinated thing I drink ^-^

I just went downstairs to put my mug and plate in the sink, and was randomly thinking how strange the extent to which people are affected by smells is. That probably seems really random. But I have a freakishly good sense of smell. And there's some scientific thing about how smell is the sense most associated with memories. I can recognise people by the way they smell (in a good way. In a good way. Not saying that people smell bad, just smell), and when I went downstairs I got caught in a hug from Nana, and it was like... memories I have associated with nana's scent - her brushing my hair when I was about seven, going into year one, and mother was always a violent hair-brusher, because she was always in a hurry. With nana, she brushed all our hair, we'd sit on the floor in front of her chair and she'd be so, so gentle. My sisters and I used to fight over who got to have her hair brushed by nana, and who was doomed to have half her hair pulled out and several hair brushed broken by mother. I blame her for my tendency to pat people's hair. It's all her fault. ^-^ But yeah, other memories from nana's smell... hm... bouncing along the beach when I was really little, and running around nana trying to get her to skip with me, which she can't do cause of her messed up knees... a lot of memories of her coming and going at the airport. So the airport is associated with nana. Because she lives in Queensland, there's always a sort of special occasion sense to seeing her. All my grandparents live in Queensland, so I don't get to see them much =(

But yes, that I can recognise people by their smell is sort of amusing... I also recognise people by the way they stand, so I can recognise silhouettes pretty well, and I recognise feet because I sit on the floor so much, and don't like to look up at people, so I just watch their feet. I recognise voices really well, too. And the way in which people talk. Give me a block of text from anyone I talk to regularly, and I'll be able to work out who wrote it from mannerisms and habits of speech. Well, a block of text of the same sort that I usually get. Like, I couldn't recognise somebody's essays. People sound completely different in essays. Not that there's really sound in writing... but still... I'm pretty good with recognising handwriting, provided I see it often enough. I just can't tell the difference between mum's and Freya's sometimes... but like, I could recognise now Becky's, Jared's, or Madeleine's handwriting, because I saw it so much last year, even though I haven't seen them writing since... yeah, last year.
I recognise people and remember them easily ^-^ Which is sort of annoying... because I always remember people's names, and they never remember mine. I'm always 'so-and-so's friend', or, or, somebody's something, and it annoys me. I'm nobody's anything, really, I'm just me. But I quite like to belong to other people... it gives me a better sense of how I fit into things... and I'm... like... what's the opposite of possessiveness? Some people are possessive, I'm not un-possessive, I just like to be on the receiving end of it. It makes me feel wanted ^-^

But yeah... wow... long, long blog...
Does this make up for filling my blog with blogthings and blogthings only for the past month or so?
It better do.
It's your turn to update, Jess. Your blog needs updating, damnit! If you update your blog, I'll take back what I said about caffeeeeeine! *wheedle* Or Mel. You update your blog, too. Mel and Jess, update your blogs. Becky, you update yours too, if you haven't already. Anybody else with blogs, update your damn blogs! I have nothing to read ='(
Look at that sad face! You're making it cry!
Update!
Damnit.
^-^

I'm not really an angry person.
I just like to shout.
^-^

More random still:
I have the music from Mr. Men stuck in my head. You know, Mister Happy and Mister Dizzy and Mister Bump (He was blue and round and had a bandage around his head. Which was also his body. Did anyone else ever notice that the Mister Men had their body and head all in one?) and whatnot. There were Little Miss Sunshine and Little Miss Forgetful and all the other Little Misses, too (For a while I had a Little Miss Psycho MSN display picture. Happy little girl with a hat and a flower... and a knife...). But I noticed when I went downstairs before, on top of the TV was this old Mr. Men tape. And now I have the voice of the narrator of the cartoon stuck in my head, as well as the plodding, content sort of music that was the song... do do do do do do do do... do do do, do do do do, dooo...
I also have the word 'bizarre' stuck in my head.
My hair smells edible.
My ankle is itchy.
My mother is washing the stairs...
There is an awesome sunset over Woden Valley right now that I think I'll go watch.
I like sunsets...
I here the music from 'As Time Goes By' downstairs... I remember that show... I remember Keeping Up Appearances, too. Who remembers that? I remember all these shows I used to watch before I started school... midday TV...

Anyway, I'm off.
There will probably be a blog on Monday detailing (or vague-description-ing) my awesome weekend.
If not, you'll just have to imagine how much fun I had.
Mwa, mwa, toodles ^-^

(... wasn't Toodles a character in Peter Pan? Wasn't he the one who lost his marbles, literally?... I'll stop talking (eventually), don't worry ^-^ )

(Written: 5:41 pm Fri. 6th March. April, rather. >.> Ignore actual post-time)

Can chickens actually do the can-can?

Oh em gee post! You guys! I exist! It's incredible, isn't it?
So I haven't posted in ages. Bleh. The days have been fun, but not exciting enough to share.
Hm...
Yesterday I got trapped in the Bay when Andrea decided to hold Christian Group there even though it was meant to be in the hall. So I got to listen to how black jelly beans are sinful.
...
Anyway.
So yeah, I was rebellious and bad and whatnot and skipped photography today to go to Tuggers with Hayley and Graham and that guy whose name I don't actually know. And... we played Dance Dance Revolution ^-^ Oh em gee that was awesome. I'd never played before but Graham made me, and then I beat Hayley when I was playing against her ^-^
And that was generally awesome and about the most exercise I have done in... far too long...
So then Anni was back for ToK which is awesome, because I hated the relief teacher we had. Yay Anni ^-^ And we watched bits of movies. Oh, I forgot English first. We watched a movie in that, too. It all sucked.
Anyway, I wandered over to Woden after school with Graham and Ryan and that guy whose name I know but don't know how to spell. Caleb perhaps. Anyway, we just basically wandered around in circles/dodecahedrons/triangles and I had an ice cream (yay)... and generally there was conversation and not a lot of interesting activity. But yeah...
So I wandered on home, and stoled the internet. I have to get offline in a few minutes.
Anyway, I am so looking forward to this party ^-^ Oh, did I not mention the party?
This weekend is going to fecking rock.
Friday: folk festival with nana and mother (anybody else who reads this who's gonna be going to the folk festival - meet up with me so I have someone other than my grandmother to talk to >.<)
Saturday: Woooooooooooooot! Party ^-^ Party at Ryan's and Hayley's, full of awesome, awesome people, and yes, alcohol and loud music and isolation (they live out in some remote large-block-of-land sort of place) and general perfect party conditions, also awesome people, did I mention that? Yes? Oh well, they're very awesome. And mother is thinking about letting me stay overnight! Woot!
Sunday: Well, I'll probably be pretty messed up for the morning and possibly part of the afternoon, too... but if I recover before the end of the day, it's ToK research essay for me =(
Monday = ToK essay day. Blegh.

Anyway, this weekend is gonna be an awesome weekend. A weekend of kickassery. Oh yes. That awesome.
Heh.
Anyway, I have carpet burned elbows and I'ma run away for a little while so mum doesn't know I've been online.
I'm off to nurse the wounds of the drama-carpet-burn-ness.
Mwa, mwa. Tootles. And whatnot.
*hugs*

Do Re Mi Banana. Zoom!

Oh my god blog.
Ba-log-a-log.
Boing.
Man.
Pfft.

Party on Saturday was for the most part very awesome indeed, though I missed some due to... conversations... that required all of my attention... yes... Also I missed a lot of the best parts 'cause mother wouldn't let me stay overnight :( Which sucks, because I wasn't drunk, and nearly everyone else was, and I wanted to laugh at all of their hangovers... Bwahahaha... evil Caitlin.
Funny moments include:
All of the girls, plus Ryan, putting plaits in Graeme's hair.
Steven walking into the sliding screen door and knocking it out of its hinges. (Very funny at the time. Maybe it's one of those only-funny-when-drunk things... not that I was drunk... >.>)
Mandy's reaction when she was allowed to get to the alcohol (she had to wait till after she was sent to collect Kim, because she was driving)
Skye's storage of the bottles and lollies, both full and empty (the microwave).
The game of Dare. Funniest moment from that that I remember and actually noticed, was Steven being dared to leave the room, and come back naked apart from a conveniently placed hat. He actually did it ^-^
Apparently Maddie got really drunk later in the night, but I missed it =( Which sucks, because when I left she was all stressed and very much sober.

Anyway, school is le bleurgh.
Funny that this spell check rejects 'Mandy', 'Maddie' and 'Graeme', as well as 'boing' and 'bla', but not the word that I thought I just made up - 'bleurgh'. How very peculiar...
Anyway, school is crap. I have several ToK journals and an English assignment due Monday, and a psychology one the week after, as well as a photography one I'm-not-sure-when and a ToK essay in week ten, and a drama one in the first or maybe second week back of school after the holidays. Also it's currently week seven, and week nine is cross-line testing week - that is, everybody has tests. On practically everything. Stressful and very crap. Bleurgh.

Bla, I had an awful cold yesterday and I wasn't quite over it today, so I stayed home, and I hung out the washing twice (that means I loaded the washing machine once. I'm very proud of that, as I hadn't used the new(ish) washing machine yet, and had no idea how to do it.) as well as eating cold pasta and porridge (not together >.<), playing guitar and piano, listening to music, noticing strange things (in my parent's en suite there are two towels, a pink one and a blue one; we have eleven junk mail catalogues on the bench to be thrown out; the shower head needs adjusting; our washing machine takes 7kg of clothes... etc.) and generally avoiding doing anything constructive (like my English or psychology assignments). Because we couldn't have that, could we?

Yesterday upon the stair
I met a man who wasn't there
He wasn't there again today
Oh, how I wish he'd go away

Quotes of Awesomeness from The Science of Discworld:
"'Where am I exactly?'
'Er... a sort of magical world with no one in it but yourself.'
'Oh, you mean the sort everyone lives in.'"

"The author blinked.
'Tell me, then,' he said, 'is Man an ape, or is he an angel?'
The Librarian knew this one.
'Ook,' he said, which meant: ape is best, because you don't have to fly and you're allowed sex, unless you work at Unseen University, worst luck."
(Note that the librarian of Unseen University is, to all extents and purposes, an orangutan, and that the library of Unseen University has a tendency to lead one to various strange places and times - say, for example, the writing desk of a certain author writing a book about evolution.)

"'The Luggage may consist of a subset of at least n dimensions which may co-exist with any other set of >n dimensions,' said the Bursar.
'Don't pay any attention, Stibbons,' said Ridcully wearily. 'He's been spouting this stuff ever since he tried to understand HEX's write-out. It's completely gibberish. What's "n" then, old chap?'
'Umpt,' said the Bursar.
'Ah, imaginary numbers again,' said the Dean. 'That's the one he says should come between three and four.'
'There isn't a number between three and four,' said Ridcully.
'He imagines there is,' said the Dean."

The Bursar is my favourite character, along with the Librarian, as well perhaps as Death, and possibly Rincewind, too, seeing as he's the one who survived in Fourecks/EcksEcksEcksEcks/XXXX/Australia in The Last Continent.

"He opened the door.
A couple of white pigeons flew out, followed by a billiard ball. Ponder pulled aside a cluster of flags of all nations.
'Just natural fallout,' he called out. 'Oh...'
The Bursar ambled around the right side of the reacting engine, waving a squash racquet.
'Ah, Ponder,' he said. 'Have you ever wondered if Time isn't simply Space through a right angle?'
'Er... no...' said Ponder, watching the man carefully for signs of thaumic breakdown.
'It would certainly make pretzels very interesting, don't you think?'
'Er... have you being playing squash, sir?' said Ponder.
'You know I'm really coming to believe that a closed contour is a boundary, up to parametrization, if and only if it is homotopic to zero,' said the Bursar. 'And, for preference, coloured green.'
'Did you touch any switches, sir?' said Ponder, maintaining a careful distance.
'This thingy here does make some shots very difficult,' said the Bursar, hitting the reacting engine. .'I was trying to hit the rear wall around it last Wednesday.'
'I think perhaps we should leave,' said Ponder in a clear, firm tone. 'It will soon be teatime. There will be jelly,' he added.
'Ah, the fifth form of matter,' said the Bursar brightly, following Ponder."

I love Discworld booksies... Terry Pratchett = god. Seriously. Some newspaper said about his novels, "Terry Pratchett has done for fantasy what Douglas Adams did for science fiction.", which is high praise indeed. You will understand what high praise this is if you've read The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. If you haven't read it, go read it now. Along with 1984. And the His Dark Materials trilogy. Books = love. Music also = love. Therefore, books = music. But, books ≠ music, therefore, - *spontaneously combusts*
Spontaneous combustion = peanut.

I am going to go design a Vegemite castle, with carrot stick window frames and candy flags.
Do not even think about how awful that would taste.
Or, for that matter, how impossible it would be to live in.
The idea is to have an idea. It doesn't need to be a practical concept.
Enjoy your days, nights, weeks, months, years, and lives. They really are just for us to enjoy.
No, I'm not high.
=)
*hugs*

Un-Ducks

I have these, like... constant pins & needles in my hands. And sometimes my arms. It's weird. And sort of painful.

So, I went and played tennis again yesterday. I got burnt again, but only a tiny bit where my sleeves moved after I put on sunscreen. My arm stopped hurting (It started hurting last time I played, cause I'm so unfit >.>). That was good. We went and got ice creams from the Curtin milk bar afterwards cause we couldn't find a carpark at the Yarralumla shops. Beh, Curtin's cheaper anyway. And their Coles is cheaper than Deakin's IGA. I know because Mother is always rambling about it. Clearly her tendency to ramble has rubbed off on me =P As well as Father's habit of waffling on when people aren't really listening. But he's a dear old thing, really.
I've been driving a fair bit. Round those half-built mansion places in that billionaire East O'Malley Estate place. Father drives me out, we get out, stick the L-plates on, and I tear around the place like a maniac. At 40km/h. And occasionally stopping unintentionally in the middle of round-a-bouts. Also I nearly hit a cyclist today. >.> But I am gradually but steadily improving. Father suggested we bring Mother along on Sunday. Mother sounded terrified at the idea =)

But yeah... generally my days go as follows:
11am - Get up, make toast with cheese and tonnes of those unidentified herb things. Read newspaper slowly. Answer a few clues in the crossword (or Sudoku, if mum hasn't done it already).
12 - sit around playing random guitar
12.30 - waste time on the intar-webz
1.30 - read or listen to music (or both)
2.30 - listen to music or read (or both)
3.30/4 - drag Father out to O'Malley and drive in circles until he falls asleep
5.30/6 - wake dad up & go home
6 - waste time, read, play guitar, watch dad work on The Cubby (Cubby may be explained in some other post)
7 - dinner, dessert, TV with family (including liberally insulting the children)
9/10/10.30 (depending on TV) - wander off to bed. Read/listen to music/write
11pm - start trying to sleep
3/4am - get to sleep
6am - wake up. Drift in and out of sleep until 11.
Repeat daily.

Because my holidays are being so monotonous and repetitive, I'm not really blogging much. I promise there will be exciting and stressed out blogs as often as I can manage when college starts!
Also, I'm going to Broulee for a week from Monday (8/1/07). So there will be no posts during that week (unless I get to an internet cafe, which I doubt will happen. Broulee is really too small for internet). However! I will try to keep a handwritten record of my boring everyday happenings. Then when I get home I can type it up and post it. But yeah...

Pins & needles haven't stopped. I have a glow-in-the-dark lizard.

Sigh, grumble. I'm sure my family will be relieved when college starts. I've been so tetchy and irritable with them. No idea why, they're being no more annoying than usual. I just keep wanting to swear (which everyone should know is something I don't often do) and hit things which I also don't often do). I don't know. I'm being a complete bitch to them all, and totally intolerant, which I hate. It's strange, I can tolerate and accept big things, but little things like my brother whining about whihch flavoured icy pole he got (he's bloody lucky to get any) and my littlest sister trying to act like me (If only she knew what a bad idea that was) are making me snap, and I want to throw tantrums and slam doors and be selfish and childish. And when I'm not doing that I'm' ignoring or avoiding them all.
I'm being a horrible daughter/sister/neice/cousin/granddaughter.
Ah well. All I can do is try harder tomorrow.

And I just wish these stupid pins & needles would go away.
Beh, offwards with me.
...
I think this toast is addictive.

Ladies and Gentlemen, we interrupt your regular programming...

Firstly! Before the blog! Melissa, Bridie's friend, says she likes my style :P
A round of applause for my style, everybody! Hehehe.
Blog:

Another night, it's gonna be a long one...

I've found the flash drive I used to use to transfer long blogs from here to there (laptop to mac), SO voila. Instant long blog. Well, almost instant.
Hmm...
Well, everyone keeps asking how my Christmas shopping is going. Er... how's crap for an answer? I don't have any bloody money, how the hell am I supposed to buy presents... It's do frustrating, because Freya's gone and spent all her own money on presents for the rest of the family, and the way we normally do things is that mum and dad pay for say, ten dollar presents for each of the kids to give each other. Now Freya's gone and got everybody all sorts of things, and she's so excited about giving gifts, it's so sweet, and I can't get her anything good in return, because I have no money. Buying things for other people is the only reason I really want money, and therefore sort of need a job.
Blah... So basically mother bought a cheap plastic thing on behalf of Bridie and me to give to Freya, and I feel really bad because it's not good enough. And she's so excited about whatever it is she's getting/got me. She's all, "You're sooooo gonna love my prezzie for you!" and I'm all, "Ah, crap."
But yes... I also want to buy things for friends, and mother doesn't finance presents for anyone outside the family, and as I have no money at all, I just can't get gifts for people. Which sucks a lot.

Anyway, in other news...
Well yeah, my nana's staying with us for Christmas, which is pretty cool. My nana's awesome.
I watched the world float to the dark side of the moon
After all I knew it had to be something to do with you
I really don't mind what happens now and then
As long as you'll be my friend at the end
Anyway, ignoring my random 3 Doors Down outburst...
Yeah, nana is cool. She's great to talk to, she talks the exact way I wish I could. That is, enthusiastically but sensibly, well-thought out and involved arguments. And when I say 'arguments', I mean it in a debating/essay writing sort of way. Not that we don't argue; two similar minds will always find fault with each other. But damn, if we're both on the same side about something, we will talk for hours, and end up repeating ourselves without realising, because we just, bounce ideas off each other, and end up with these huge long spiels as to why we think what we do and why it's right, and like... very, very cool.
Nana is awesome. She's an incredibly intelligent woman. And she's not lost one ounce of that intelligence over the years. She's often surprisingly similar to me. Smart, sarcastic, stubborn, silly at random times, amongst other things. Man, I need to stop using words that start with 's'. =P But yes, we also both have a lot in common with my mother. Which means the three of us will have great conversations, but are also likely to argue over trivial things and not admit we're wrong.

We went to the National Gallery today. Not to see that Egyptian exhibit, we're too broke for that. Only, it's only $6 for me, cause I still count as a child (6-15). But it's $20 for mother, and we're that broke that we can't afford that. Anyway, we were wandering around, and mother and I started laughing madly about something, I can't even remember what it was now, and then nana joined in, and just... it's great, to be able to get along so well with my family. I know so many people who are constantly arguing and fighting with their parents, or who think their grandparents are boring, and I feel very lucky to have such a cool family. =)
But yes... we went to the member's lounge (immature sniggering goes here. Oh, man, my mind is perverted) and the mother and grandmother had coffee, and I had... dun dun dun... iced chocolate! I haven't had iced chocolate in so long... XD Tis so yummy! But yes. We got into the member's lounge cause nana's a member of the national gallery... club... thing... whatever it is.

Anyway.
My father was brushing my brother's hair this evening, and said, "You need to get your hair cut, little fellow. We both do." and Connor protested vehemently, saying he wanted to have his hair "like Uncle David's".
Weeeelll... My Uncle David's hair comes down to about fifteen centimetres below his shoulders. And then he's semi-bald on top -.-"
Presumably Connor was only talking about the long hair part of that. I'd encourage him, I think long hair is cute, but I really doubt it would suit him. Also, I think his hair is just the wrong type to grow like that. There are photos of dad when he wasn't so bald - not that he's amazingly bald now, but he's certainly thinning - and his hair, when he kept it longer (As was the fashion in those days... =P) was just sort of, shaggy. Instead of growing down, it grew out. And I suspect Connor's hair would do the same thing. Mother doesn't want him to have long hair, anyway.
Bah... long hair is superness. And very fun to mess up. Bwahahah ^-^
But yes. My aunt's three sons have all had long hair at some stage or other, and the youngest still has long hair now, but it's all, curly, type stuff, and just cuteliness, which wouldn't work in Connor's hair. That's Hamish, the little one with long hair. Darcy, the middle one, has had varying lengths of hair, but Darcy has that irritating air about him of being able to make anything stylish, so what he does with his hair doesn't matter. Angus, the oldest of those cousins, has reasonably short hair now, but it was long and curly and blond when he was little... we have photos to prove it! Embarrassing family photos! Bwahahahaha... but yes.

Wow.
I just wrote like, four paragraphs about hair.
My god I am lame ^-^
Hehe.

Anyway, Vanessa came over before. Vanessa is my neighbour, and she used to be my piano teacher, and I babysit for her a lot. She came bearing... large amounts of piano music!! The exact thing I've been whining about not having enough of for the past few months! Unfortunately, I already have most of it. But it should give me something to entertain myself with during the holidays. Which is good, because otherwise I'll just sleep all day.
Though I do plan to try to clean out my room at some stage. Mother says if I clean my room I can paint the walls... very cool. And when I say 'paint', I mean like, paint. With pictures. And I know exactly what I want to paint. I refuse to tell any of you, though, and if it goes ahead and succeeds, I shall take multitudes of photos and post them all up here.

Touch my tears
With your lips
Touch my world
With your fingertips

Mm, random interjection of sweet music... <3 =P

So much I
Wish I could
So many I
Wish I would
So much I
Wish I could
Count on you not to defeat me
Please don't turn away
Again
Please don't turn me in
To them
Please don't turn away
A friend
Please don't turn me in
To them

Storm In A Teacup is better, though. And 21st Century. Damn that song is awesome.

Anyways... I shall leave you with (Dun da daaaa):

Random lyrics to a song I don't particularly like and haven't heard in ages (because I usually skip it):

The winter here's cold
And bitter
It's chilled us to the bone
I haven't seen the sun in weeks
Too long too far from home
I feel just like I"m sinking
And I claw for a solid ground
Pulled down by the undertow
Never thought I could feel so low
In the lone darkness I feel like letting go
With all of the strength
All of the courage
Come and lift me from this place
I know I can love you much better than this
It's better this way
I'd say
Haven't seen this place before
And everything we say and do
Hurts us all the more
Just that we've stayed
Too long
In the same old sickly skin
Pulled down by the undertow
I never thought I could feel so low
In the lone darkness I feel like letting go
With all of the strength
All of the courage
Come and lift me from this place
I know I can love you much better than this
I know I can love you much better than this
It's better this way...

And while I'm listening to vaguely depressing music:

All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places
Worn out faces
Bright and early for the daily races
Going nowhere
Going nowhere
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression
No espression
Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrow
No tomorrow
No tomorrow
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it's a very very
Mad world
Mad world
Vhildren waiting for he day they feel good
Happy birthday
Happy birthday
And I feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen
Sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me
No one knew me
Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson
Look right through me
Look right through me
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it's a very very
Mad world
Mad world
Enlarging your world
Mad world

Off for now, tootles all!

And and and and Squeeee!! ^.^

Formal!!
zomfgz!!111one!!212!!!@@!two!3.141!!1!!
It was sooo awesome.
Kay kay kay I shall start at the beginning...
Well, a little after I finished the last post, I went and got my hair done. Oh, em, gee. *Then* I was excited. I hadn't been excited till my hair was done, and then I was sooo excited. Freya came with me, and I met up with Izzy there, and they were standing around oohing and aahing over my hair, and I got it cut, so now it's just below my shoulders. And the hairdresser curled it, and put half of it up in this tumbly swirly thingy, and it was pretty and involved over twenty hair clips and three or four invisible hair ties.
So yes.
I got home, and when I was trying to put my dress on I got stuck, cause I didn't want to mess up my hair, so I had to get Freya and Izzy to both help me get dressed -.-" But it was funny, so twas all good. And then Izzy did my make up super dooperly and and and.... then I got my bag, stoled mum's phone, put on my prettiful earrings, and bounced downstairs, before putting on my shoes and getting taken out onto the deck for LOTS AND LOTS OF PHOTOS!! Omigod I have so many photos! I don't actually have any yet, but there are heaps on mum's camera and Izzy has heaps on her digital camera and there are more I'll mention in a moment.
Anyway, I was almost late by that time, so everyone was rushed to wherever they were meant to go, and mum drove me down to Canberra College, where we were all meeting. Rosalind, Martin, Toby and Stephen were there already, and oh my gawd, everyone was gorgeous! Except Stephen. But like, Wow! Rosalind was soooo pretty, her hair was so nice and she had such a beautiful dress, I seriously didn't recognise her she was done up so much. And yes, then Ethan turned up, with his random hair, which wasn't as bad as usual but was still strange. Then Jared arrived, with a Mysterious Plastic Bag of Mystery (All shall be revealed, but not yet =P). And and and there were lots more photos, and then the bus arrived, and oh, my, god. It was like, this huge yellow double decker bus!! And I was thinking it was gonna be some crap broken down van or something, and instead it was a really fun, albeit rather broken down, big yellow bus, and there was really loud music, and Becky and Kirsten and Adrian came out of the bus, and oh em gee Agaaaain! cause Becky and Kirsten were beautiful too! Not that anybody isn't always beautiful but, like, wow! And Becky's hair was even more complicated than mine =P And and Kirsten's hair was all curliful and I didn't know it was that long, but apparently it is.
Anyway, more photos were taken with the bus (Which said "Beauty Point Express 069" on the front of it =P) and everyone got on, and we left, and there was crap music, but then it changed to Eskimo Joe, and we were all like, hell yes. And and and... it was such a big bus!
And yeah, Ethan and Martin and Becky and Rosalind and Kirsten and Jared and I were up the front, and Toby and Adrian were up the back dancing badly to the music, and Stephen was sitting somewhere or other. Anyway, Jared opened the window, or committed some other minor offence like that, and I was all, "You sabotagey person, you're trying to ruin my hair!", or something like that, I think, and he pulled this rose out of the Mysterious Bag of Mystery, and was like, "Maybe I can apologise with this." and my brain ate itself, cause I was like, not sure if he was just joking or screwing around with my mind or what, so I just blinked for a long time. But I recovered eventually, mostly =P I think I also forgot to say thank you -.-" If I did forget, then Thanks, Jared =P If I didn't forget, then Thanks again, anyway =P
Anywayz, we were waiting to get to the front of the line in the carpark, and sitting and looking down at all the people who'd already arrived, and Martin was just randomly like, "Wow, there are so many people here... maybe I should have done my hair...", and we all cracked up.
But yes, the formal was so much fun.
When we arrived and got off the bus, everyone was finding their parents and getting more photos, and I went and found mum, and of course, the first thing she noticed was that I was holding a rose, and she was all like, "Oooooh. Who's that from?" and I was like, "Jared.", and she was like, "That poor boy whose hair you destroyed?" and I'm like, "Yes, mother. Though look [pointing out Jared], it has recovered." and she said I was silly.
But yeah, we had food, and twas yummy.
And we took our shoes off and everyone ran down the grass towards the lake behind the cafe table things in the NMA (National Museum of Australia). And generally strolled around outside and inside, and talked, and stuff. And everybody looked so good!
And we got heaps and heaps of photos from the professional photographer dude, and we get them on disks apparently, with everyone's photos.
It was soo funny, though, cause Toby was like, "Someone come get a photo with me, I don't wanna be alone" and I'm like, "Yeah, I'll go" and the photographer was like, "Are you two a couple?" and Toby and I both said no at the same time, and the photographer like, completely ignored us, and was like, "OK, you wrap your arm around her there, like you own her, ok, now you, you put your arm around him , and you lean on him, and put your hand inside his jacket, like that, yep" and I was like, laughing, so hard, and I was all, "Oh my god, I can't do this!!" and Toby was laughing, and the photographer was just being completely crazy, it was so funny!
But yes, it was super super super fun, even though the only good songs they played all night were Californication and My Friend Robot.
And I felt super special all night cause I had a rose =)
But yes.
We (Becky and I, and Adrian and Toby) got back to Becky's at like, midnight, and sat around talking till about 1am, and then Becky and I went into our room, and Toby and Adrian went into their room, and Becky and I stayed up bitching about Stephen and reading the yearbook till like, 3.30, then Becky's mum came in and told us to go to sleep.

I spent all day yesterday trying on practically every dress and pair of shoes in Tuggeranong with Becky, and it was so fun, even though I only bought the first dress I tried on. And and and I'm prolly going to Tuggers this afternoon to get some shoes with Freya. ^-^
But yeah, general awesomeness.

Okies! I be's off =)
*hugs*

Drowned Munchkin Potatoes

Grades so far:
World Issues - A (I'm so super :P)
Photography - C (Apparently I would have gotten an A if I did one or both of the major assignments...)
English - not sure yet
Japanese - B (Le shock and le surprisedness! I dunno how I managed a B, considering I hardly ever do any work...)
Maths - also not sure yet
Science - again, not sure yet
Outdoor Ed - D or E (No surprises there :P)

I had world issues just before, and I got my essay back, and even though I didn't actually do any research for it, and therefore lost ten percent for not having a bibliography, I got 88%. Go me. And the group class presentation teachy doowhatsy thingo got 90%. Go us.
Bleeehh... Formal is shaping up to be a whole lotta fun:
Bekcy is pissed at me cause I got kinda hyper from milo, stopped thinking, and told Toby who Kirsten liked. Stephen overheard and told Rosalind, who then told Martin. I'm guessing she's also pissed at me because I've been a bitch to her about everything. But hey, I don't like apologising when I'm in the wrong like this. I know what I *should* have done was apologise for telling when Becky told me not to, but I dunno, I just, really didn't feel like being yelled at and whining for forgiveness. So that's crap. And apparently Rosalind and Kirsten and Becky are organising a limo or summin for the formal, and chances are I'll be missing that one out. Rosalind asked if I wanted to go with them, but Becky has unsurprisingly avoided mentioning it, and I don't want to piss her off more by inviting myself.
Other crap about the formal:
I still need shoes, and the formal is in two weeks exactly. I also have nothing planned for my hair, tragedy of tragedies. I only think that's a problem because my hair looks utterly *crap* until it's reduced a couple of hairdressers to tears and left a third one standing and staring at it, wondering how such a mess could possibly exist.

But yeah...
Yesterdayness, Freya and a pile of her friends went out to some river somewhere, and mother, Connor, Bridie and I went down to the lake with the Aunt, Uncle, and small, noisy cousin. Mother, Adair, Nigel, and I (And I think Hamish, too, actually) didn't end up going in the water, because it was sooo hot when we got in the car, and then when we got there it was freezing. So that sucked.
And then we ended up not going to body balance, which really wasn't a problem. Only I totally failed at cooking sausages for dinner. And I forgot to cut up the potatoes before I put them in the water. So that screwed up, mother yelled at me, and I gave up on that.
Bleh.
Assessment's finished, so like... I have time to waste in classes... and oh, moi, gawd. There is going to be some "Party Safe" thing longline on Wednesday. They're going to tell us not to drink, I bet, and that if we do drink to watch our glasses and whatever. Bla, bla, bla, Duuuuuh. Sounds like it is going to be pure boredom, but it's compulsory. Bleurgh.
Jeebus it's freezing in the photography lab. It's like, really warm outside, and freezing in here. It's also kinda freezing in English, which I have longline, so...
Neh.
Offwards...ness.... stuff... type... yeah...

And it was called, Yellow...

Mmkaaayz...
Piano 'smorning was 'kay.
On the way to school, mother randomly started singing this random PlaySchool song, and like... she didn't know absolutely all the words, so she got about this much of it:

"I'm a dingle-dangle scarecrow
With a flippy-floppy hat
I can shake my... um... something like this
I can shake my something like that"

And then she paused for a second, and went, "But we won't go into what the 'something' is."
And I covered my ears and went, "Mu-um!!"
And she grinned and went, "It brings an all new meaning to 'dingla-dangle scarecrow'."
And I covered my ears even more, and went, "That's awful!", even though I was already laughing, and she started laughing too, and noted that "It would scare more than the crows!"
So we were laughing so much on the way to school, and that was really funny.
But yeah, English first and I handed in that assignment, and there was a presentation with chocolate and Madeleine kept taking more than she should have, but I didn't cause I'm a Good Girl. Hmph =P
Japanese was bleh, teacher was like, majorly stressed, and I'm probably getting a B, which is amazing considering how little work I actually did.
Madeleine and I had sheets from the science assignment in maths, so we could do that, but Madeleine did like, two sentences and then was watching like, random animations and wasting time, cause we were in the computer lab.
And again, at lunch, Jared and I went in and spent our lunchtime doing work on the assignment, but Madeleine wouldn't come in. Apparently she had assignments for other classes. Which she said yesterday, as well. You'd think she could come in for at least one lunchtime, but no, apparently not.
And then in science she did about half a page and then fell asleep, and Jared had to do the test he missed yesterday, so I was like, writing flat out all lesson, and the assignment didn't get finished, but the teacher said he's mark us as high as he could. But like, I'm really annoyed at the utter lack of dedication Madeleine showed for it. It was a simple assignment, and fun, it should have been easy, but Madeleine spent the first week analysing her hair and pretending to work, and the rest of the time going, "But I analysed the evidence at the beginning!" No, your hair is Not evidence. Gr...
Anyway, outdoor ed last and the was boring.
I got 79% on the math test and 70% on the science test, by the way. Not bad, considering I didn't know the stuff for either. =P
Anyway, Freya is being an idiot. So I'm getting dragged off now.

Musical Apple

My essay so far:
"Do we have a social responsibility to care for the mentally ill?
Yes."

... I'm a great writer, amn't I?
Seriously though, I don't think I'll do too badly with this assignment...
... Once I start it.
Which could be some time away.
Even though it was due last Monday, and I'll be handing it in on this Monday, if I have it done by then.

But yeah... I don't really remember yesterday... so I won't bother trying to write much about it.
I remember we had nachos and mother and I filled up a page with ideas for this essay.
I remember the nachos cause I love nachos.
I remember the assignment work because, believe it or not, for the first time I can ever remember, mother said something nice about me. And what's really surprising is that she said it now, after we've been so pissed at each other for the past... since... since a month or so before I got that fridge, whenever that was.
I talked for five minutes straight about one aspect of the question, and at the end she looked at me, and said, "You really are a smart girl, Caitlin."
And the first thing I said was, "Are you being sarcastic?"
Which shows how much it surprised me, because I hate asking that unless I'm really, really not sure.
But apparently she wasn't being sarcastic. So that was very, very strange. But good, I guess.

But yeah... t'day... rolled out of bed around eleven, got online and stayed there until about two o'clock, during which time I actually managed to out-pervert the King of Perverted-teenage-minds... No Lardo, not you, another perverted teenager =P
But yes, around two-twenty we went down to Phillip pool, cause it reopened on the first of this month, whatever month it is now.
That was pretty fun. I managed not to get burnt, which is always good. I actually managed to not get burnt, even though I lay in the sun for an hour or so with Aunty Adair, being lazy and absorbing heat.
But yeah... that was pretty good, got back, got changed, and went down to Woden with Freya and got MUSIC.
I got more music.
By 'got', I mean, I actually bought it.
I have the physical form of music, and I payed for it.
What a strange feeling...
But really, it was $20 for two RHCP CDs, Mother's Milk and What Hits?!, so I'm like, sure, Freya and I can go half-half and we can share both CDs.
Having heard all of What Hits?! and almost none of Mother's Milk, I can conclude that Mother's Milk is a way better CD. Why? Because a lot of What Hits?! was pretty shoddy. Bleh. But hey, twas cheap, and Mother's Milk looks pretty damn good.
I wanna hear Nobody Weird Like Me, Taste The Pain, Pretty Little Ditty, Sexy Mexican Maid, Castles Made of Sand, and yeah. The alright-sounding ones that I want to hear again from What Hits?! are Show Me Your Soul, Jungle Man, Hollywood, Catholic School Girls Rule, and maybe Knock Me Down.
But yeah... there's a lot of music on these discs... tis good, tis good...
And I saw all these CDs I wanted to get... there was Queen for $15 and Van Morrison for $15 and a Beatles CD with thirty songs on it for $20, and and and music...
Only I had like, no money.
And I always have like, no money.
But that reminds me, on the way down to Woden we passed my neighbour's house (No really... I was walking down my street and all of a sudden, there was this house, that is next to mine, and you know where it was? It was right there, next to my house. Seriously, it was.) and they're like, "Hey, wanna babysit on the first or second?"
and I'm like, "Yeah, why not, not like I have a social life."
and they're like, "Cool, we'll talk to you about money and stuff later. Oh, and do you and Freya wanna waitress at our party on the ninth?"
and Freya's like "Oooh!"
and I'm like, "Yeah, sounds cool."
and they're like, "Oh yeah, we'll pay you."
and I'm like, "Yay."
and Craig goes, "Yeah, we'll give you fifty cents and let the guests tip you."
and Vanessa goes, "Ignore him, never talk money with Craig, we'll negotiate about payment later.",
and Freya's like, "Yay!"
and I'm like, "Dude, you have a proper job already, why do you need more money?"
and she's like, "There is never enough money."
and I'm like, "Good point."
and we went to Woden.
Inhale.
Exhale.
And that is the conversation that means I may be getting payed to whack people over the head with trays of alcoholic drinks.
Maybe I have a different understanding of serving people than them...
Actually, there's another idea...
Heheh.
Heheheheheheheheh.
Double entendres ftw.
Hearts y'all.
Cause I felt like saying it.
=)

Man, my head is screwed.
All I've eaten today is milo and ice cream and a thingo of chips, so like, whoa. And like, yeah, that kinda Woot.
Which may account for the fact that I am fucking HYPER.
Hell yes.
^-^

But yes, in other news, my butt hurts.
Yay!
I am hyper!
Yayayayay!
Ooh, what was that word?
Yattaaaaaaaaa!!
Summin like that ;)

Gah, dude, falling off my seat, so much talent and so little to do but bounce and waste time like monkey toenails and Wheee!!!

Burp.

Several glasses of water and an itsy bitsy nap later...

Yeah, back to slightly more logical topics...
A couple of, shall I say, friends of mine, are pissed off at each other.
Part of me is pissed off at each of them for being pissed off at each other, because both of them are damn awesome, and have no reason to be fighting like they are.
Another part of me is seeing one of their sides more clearly than the other, because I've been in a similar position myself, and because the other person will not explain their side of the story, and in fact, refuses to talk about the whole shenanigans.
Yet a third, selfish part of me, is secretly punching the air and Yessss!ing, because the only time either of them really talks to me, is when they're not talking to each other.
So that's kinda confusing.
I'm trying to stay neutral, but I've known one far longer than the other. But then, the one I've known for less time seems to be telling more of the truth, and she's actually telling me what she says is going on, whereas the one I've known longer simply says "I don't want to talk about it" and shuts up about it, and changes the topic if I so much as mention in passing the other person.
So I'm kind of siding with the person I've known for less time's time... and still, being über-nice to the one I've known longer, because that person is impossible to be mad at, and in fact, impossible not to like.
So that's really sort of confusing.
And I probably made it even more confusing with the way I talk.
But hey.

A random trip out the window, dinner, dessert, a completed world issues assignment and a glass of pink milk later:
I am going to bed.
Hugs for everyone, now I am going to go lie down before I pass out in this seat.
Too-ra.
=)

The Blue Sailboat In My Head

~

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me, and
Just forget the world?
Chasing Cars - Snow Patrol

I am officially in love with Snow Patrol. I'd only heard Run, and I thought, well yes, it's my favouritest song of all time, but maybe it was just a fluke.
No.
I just got Chasing Cars (Thanks Mel!).
I love Snow Patrol.
I love this song.
It is so beautiful.

Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads

Best lyrics, those. I have them in my MSN name.

All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes
They're all I can see

I'm afraid I've become addicted to this song.
Ah well, tragic.

I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel
Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I saw V for Vendetta last night.
Damn good movie. Only problem is, now I have to watch it again.
It reminded me of 1984, the world that was created, and the slogans...
"Strength through unity
Unity through faith"
Reminded me of 1984's slogans:
"Ignorance is knowledge
Peace is war
Freedom is slavery"

1984's are probably in the wrong order, and perhaps "Freedom is slavery" is meant to be "Slavery is freedom", but the general idea is the same.

It's a scary idea, in that it is so disconcertingly possible. 1984 is set, perhaps deliberately, in a land that is not identified as any of the countries in the world today. V for Vendetta is set in the UK. One of their slogans is "Britain will prevail", or "England will prevail" or something, my memory isn't great. Is it strange that I find that more reassuring than hearing the words "America will be victorious" constantly on today's news?
Perhaps it was generally accepted by the filmmakers that to set it in the US would be too close to the current and real situation...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bleurgh...
I had to go downstairs to get dinner, and Bridie and Connor were throwing wooden blocks and toy trucks around and making heaps of noise. Then I came upstairs and had to help Freya set up this random palmtop-mac connection thing. Which totally ruined the nice, contemplative mood I had going there.
Bleh, also I'd kind of run out of stuff to say... But I'll come up with something.
Mmm, stirfry.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yeah... I got up at about eleven this morning, because I stayed up so late watching that movie last night.
And then I ate and read the newspaper and waited for Freya to get off the computer till midday. Then I wasted time (chasing cars, around my head) talking to people who didn't want to be talking to me, trying unsuccessfully for about an hour to download Chasing Cars from LimeWire, before Mel sent it to me. (Thankee!)
Yes... talked to... people... but not for long enough. It's never for long enough.
Did a bit of English work, went to Body Balance, which had crappy music today, got back, and got onto this computer, after the little ones crashed it and couldn't get it going again.
And here I am.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Does anybody actually read the nonsense that I write?
Well yes, I know Mess reads it, and David says he reads it, and Jared and Lardo read it sometimes, and I think Jess does, too.
I suppose what I'm actually wondering is, does anybody read it, and find it funny, or interesting, or anything other than boring and meaningless?
What do I write? I write crap. I write whatever happens to me each day.
If I find my life boring, why should any of you find it interesting? What does anyone who reads this care about what so-and-so said in maths today, or how many bowls of noodles I had for breakfast today?
*sigh*
Is there a point to this blog?
I guess there is, in that I like to write it. It's like writing in a diary. But if I didn't blog for a month, would anybody apart from me notice?
Scratch that, I know at least two people would notice. But would anybody care? I doubt it.
I won't stop blogging. Because it's become part of my routine. When I have something or someone I want to avoid, I set up the laptop on my bed and sit and write for a few hours, lock myself away in my room, turn up the music, and cry, laugh, bounce or half-sleep while typing for two or three hours.
And I suppose that's it, really. It's my way to get away from everything, absolutely everything else. Because I'm talking to no one but myself, nobody will disagree with me or make me feel completely worthless. Except perhaps me. I don't feel like I'm wasting people's time, because it's so easy to simply close the window and stop reading, if the crap I write is boring you.
I concentrate on what I'm thinking, and don't concentrate on the work I'm supposed to be doing. I don't concentrate on the mess in my room I'm supposed to clean, I don't concentrate on those overdue English assignments, I don't concentrate on trying to make light conversation with people I'm having serious disagreements with. *cough* Mother *cough*.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Damnit, now I have a bowl of stir fry and I'm not at all hungry.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hum ho. I'm just wondering whether there was anything that brought about that rant about bloggliness.
I doubt there was anything specifically relating to blogs that did it, that's not how my brain works. Something will make me want to rant, make me upset or angry or happy or obsessive, and I'll rant about whatever happens to float through my mind at that exact moment.
I suspect the whining rant was brought on by being pissed off at mother about the whole, no driving thing. Anyone who's talked to me in the past couple of weeks will know, I was really, really looking forward to getting that licence and actually feeling like I'd achieved something, but no. Mother doesn't trust my "mental stability". Well, fuck her.
She says, "I can't have you having a hissy fit while you're driving".
Well for one thing, they're not "hissy fits". Fuck. You'd think she'd pay attention to the flipping psychologists, even if she won't pay attention to me.
And for another, driving is not the sort of thing that would bring on one of those so-called "hissy fits".
I get anxiety attacks when I fail at something I know I should be doing well at. Or something I think I should be doing well at.
I don't expect to sit in the driver's seat of a car and immediately be able to drive, or even know how to start the bloody thing. I have never driven before.
It's something I would learn, very slowly, and I wouldn't expect to learn quickly. So I'd be learning slowly, which would be how I'd expect to be learning. So no "hissy fits".
But no, mother rejects logic.
So as you may be able to tell, I am not pleased with my mother, and she is not pleased with me.
We'll get over it, eventually, but right now I am severely pissed off.
Also, my leg makes a bloody useless mousepad.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo!!
This song is goddamned funny. XD
It's quite awful at times, but it's hilarious in that the euphemisms are so horrible. I mean, "quiver bone"?! You have to laugh at that.

So hypothetically
I don't want to beat around the bush
Foxtrot
Uniform
Charlie
Kilo
Foxtrot
Uniform
Charlie
Kilo

Heh.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Caitlin's Lesson Of The Day:
Chopsticks do not go in eyes.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anyway, I have work to pretend to do, so. I'd best be off.

Hugs for y'all.

~

Stab. Stab, stab, stab.

People, people, people.
I spent almost the entire morning online, until the computer started being all retarded and screwy.
And I HAVE A NEW MSN!
Yes, people, this DOES mean that it should now not crash at random moments! Hurrah!
And... I got Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo. And cackled madly at it for qutie some time =P
Bridie broke the mouse on the laptop and was chucking this huge spaz and I had to calm her down, being the only vaguely responsible person home. Yes, I can be responsible, but only in comparison to Connor and Bridie.
But yes... Went shopping... bought nothing, came home with the most horribly horribly painful back and feet and legs.
And mother says I can't get my L's till next year. Why? Because she has "concerns" about my "mental stability".
Y'all know how much I was looking forward to getting my licence.
She knew how much I was looking forward to it.
Stupid stupid stupid fucking fucktard of a retard.
But yes...
Caitlin is Super Dooper PISSED OFF.
=)